ATEM, LIFTING THE VEIL A WHILE

or: the adventure of a consciousness

He said:  I did something completely unexpected, unheard before, this action has  additioned to the different possible approaches we have with the inner divinity. It is too early to say which will be the result because in a sense, I myself am the result of that action and  as far as I know the process has not reached yet the end. 
I have stepped on virgin unxeplored land.

"Would you please explain exactly what you did ?  Students are convinced that after Sri Aurobindo there´s no unexplored land anymore".

"Mine is not related, or not directly related with layers of consciousness of a being, but with the possibilities of the being itself, in that, I have stepped in an ignored land. 
 Since thousand of years the yogui, the sadhu, the ashramite, undertook a sadhana having as supreme aim in their lives to finally release themselves on the hands of the inner divinity, the inner Self, but none has ever volitively refused the presence of the Self  having the Grace of knowing it.
 I rapresent a singularity in the field of self discovery, an "unheard-of-before" case, and it has to produce some result somewhere. Otherways it will only affect my own personal sphere and relation with the divinity, but having subtely met Sri Aurobindo and Satprem in several occasions since then, I have reasons to believe it may affect things other than myself.

"What exactly happened"?  "Could you be more explicit about the experience"?

" I had been sitting cross-legged from early dawn till sunset, unmoving the whole day.
 My mind absorbed in a silence into which could be impossible to harbour a single thought. At every breath the ecstasy renewed incessantly, submerging my whole being into an unending rapture of joy, my consciousness sat above my physical head, the Spirit expanded time into an eternal Now. A fathomless  Singular Presence which only could be God itself was the only reigning Identity.
 Than another identity arose within my breast and said to the divine Presence: I can wait after death to enjoy this Communion, while living, the miserable conditions of the human being makes me impossible to delight in this Joy.

It took hours to get the consciousness back from its seat above the head, at the same time the ecstasy slowly remitted till I got back into an ordinary consciousness.
Sitting by the pond under the stars I knew I had just made a choice which would affect my whole life.
Then suddenly  the words of Sri Aurobindo resounded within my mind: it is not for us that we do our sadhana but for the earth. Our, is the yoga of the earth.

Yes, divine Master!  How true your words! Now they where clear and meaningful as never before.

 Till then I had been looking for a personal freedom, but now that aim was not important anymore, my need had shifted from my personal sphere to assume imperfection on earth as my own incumbency, I had not a personal tread anymore, not a personal destiny anymore but bounded to the destiny of the earth. 

When Sri Aurobindo met that white infinity he remained there, went farther, I went the other way round. He went up, I went below.

I have created a singularity, in a sense, I have forced the divinity to answer and provide to such a singularity which has never produced before. The fact is that even when there was such refuse of fusion with the Self, nowadays I had reached it, that fact could not be ignored and had to produce some reaction. Hopefully I had ignited some ignored mechanism which could add a momentum to the adventure of the consciousness.

Years later, when I met Sri Aurobindo it remainded me of his period in jail in Alipore, while receiing the subtle visits of Vivekananda, I could enjoy his subtle presence and ear for several nights his teaching about the characteristics of "this consciousness", he never used any other term to describe it, not supermental, overmental or whatever, he always referred to it as "this consciousness".

You know that during one of this visits he showed me the Vision of Savitri and the future earth, which is here reported, and this, in answer to his requirement, so I can´t really say how my life is tied to His work, but there lay the evidence of a connection.

Having seen Satprem twice too, both in his subtle body, leads me to believe there is a reciprocal connection, but I am the less aware of my condition because as I said I´m exploring a singularity.

It is difficult to convey the whole of the implications of my circumstance, in part I´ve been doing it while writing in this blog, but much of what is happening is so subtle that I can hardly describe it. For instance, some of my experiences recall the ones Satprem describes, as reaching the bottom of a well with the sensation it was not possible to go farther, I found myself twice in such a well, I remember quite well the sensation, as it was not possible to dig deeper than that rocky bottom.

Another experience similar to Satprem is the one he describes in    http://flammedalterite.wordpress.com/notebooks-of-an-apocalypse/  :

  something happened... There was a slow-slow immobility in the whole body, an extraordinarily dense and powerful immobility,...and that something was totally unknown and new, without any human equivalent −.... as if one was going into something else but without moving! 

 With little difference I could describe the experience with his very words. 
In the time-line I´m much closer to Satprem than to Sri Aurobindo himself, what the Master discovered was later developed and in the course of time, perspectives and even experiences slightly differed, there where new developments, I could continue farther but I will stop here for today.

I will post next some more information, and describe some of the visits of the Master.